A Pleasant Reminder of What Matters

So it turns out that we're currently living in the 21st century. This is amazing, especially to someone like me who has a hard time understanding and accepting that the 90s are long over and that they aren't ever coming back.... ever. And that's not to say that with my lust for days gone by, I haven't followed the advances in technology. In fact, that's one of the few advantages to being a man of his early 20s who is desperately clinging on the idea that he's still "proper wicked" and "hip to the max".

Deep seated Peter Pan complexes aside, this age in which we are living is an incredibly extraordinary era in human history.

For the first time in our existence, we have access to all of the world's pooled knowledge with regards to everything. That's right, EVERYTHING. This is the equivalent to having a cheat book for life, in that we can research and learn all sorts of amazing things about whatever we want, without having to either...

A) Die as a result of trial and error whilst attempting to figure stuff out first hand
or B) Go around invading foreign places to see what neat stuff they have over there that we don't.

Just to deviate for a moment, can I just stress how much I love the term "Foreign"? As if people who aren't from your home country have just flown in from space or something? To the people who refer to anyone as "Foreigners", let me tell you a secret: We're all people, dammit. You're foreign to them too, so shut your stupid face up you self important sperm merchant. I mean your native country MUST to be the "Real" one, right? I mean YOU'RE from there and you're the protagonist in this children's adventure which we all call life, right? Christ.

Staying Focused: The unwinnable struggle of Mr. Seph Bentos.

ANYWAY, I could say this same thing a million times over, but chances are it would eventually bore you to the point of wanting to strangle me with an old garden hose, whilst continuously punching me in a place that only women who must be pretty desperate usually touch. Which is fair enough. I'd do it to you too, if the roles were reversed.

....That is, I'd do the strangling and dick punch thing. Not the thing the ladies do to my groin. We aren't close enough for that yet.

But while this is all true, it will never get any less mind blowing. All that it takes is the mere click of a button and we can gain instant access to the collective knowledge of people all over the planet and throughout history.

Now, I know that at this point if you're still reading this you're probably thinking:

"Well yeah, Seph. It's the internet. Did you just get a computer or something?"

And that's a valid point. I'm getting to it. Why am I even explaining this to you of all people, someone who is more than likely using that very same internet to read this crayon scrawl of an article in the first place? The internet (Or "webbernet" as us seriously happening 90s kids refer to it) has become one of the most popular inventions in human history, along with the flushable toilet and (for some reason) Sarah Jessica Parker.

With all of this knowledge available to us, you'd think that we'd be gathering up as much information as possible, learning something new and maybe even useful every day. You know, for silly reasons such as wanting to better yourself as a person and as a result live a more enriched life, or so as to not be completely ignorant to the strenuous endeavors and life long achievements of others for ONE CAT CRAPPING SECOND, stuff like that. Right? RIGHT? Wrong.

Humanlings & their undeniable superiority to us mere mortals.

Turns out that this newest generation of humanlings (a subspecies of your garden variety human who are generally smaller with more punchable faces and attitudes) already know everything, in spite of their short time on this planet.

Well, shit.

Isn't that something? They already know everything. Guess we should lay off them then and leave them to listen to their "GOOD music" like Kesha and Justin Bieber, while they play their "mega original video games".

Screw that, buddy.

Does no one else think that the current generation of humanlings are just a LITTLE god damn over-confident and condescendingly vocal for a generation that has achieved so little? For a generation that has never once been forced by law to do something like fight in a war for the ensured survival of their people against their will, or make it through hardships such as slavery or plagues?

Christ, the current generation doesn't even have to get their arse up and walk to the shop anymore because with the advances in technology, you can click a second button and someone will BRING your shopping to your front door. Someone who's only working that job so that they can afford an internet connection which will allow them in turn to pay some other guy to bring them their shopping.

It's a very clever system they have going there, if not a bit pointless.

But Seph, aren't YOU an ignorant 20 something with an unimaginable amount of flaws TOO?

Yes. yes I am. But at least like an unfortunately modest amount of other people my age I'm trying, you know?

Now don't get me wrong. Don't let my opening statements about how I have an affinity for the 90s cloud your perception of my point, here. I'm definitely not trying to say "Hey, these new kids suck, right? Am I right guys? Yeah! OUR generation on the other hand are BOSS and perfect in EVERY WAY imaginable....TO THE MAX.".

Not at all.

(Although, with stuff like Pogs and Sega Mega Drives being from that era, I may get away with that statement.)

What I AM saying, is that the current youth, myself included, have never really had any real hardships forced upon them, if we're being totally honest, really, really for real, really. Not anything that warrants the near constant displays of total disinterest towards the achievements of our ancestors and fellow humans, anyway.

There have been a few incidents, yes, but never anything we've had to fight tooth and nail for for years at a time, twenty four hours per day against our will, which is why certain common contemporary phrases tend to rub me up the wrong way. Not too dissimilar from those aforementioned desperate women (Get it? Rubbing? Ah whatever...).

Which phrases you ask? Phrases like these:

"OMG, I am SUCH a COD WIDOW. FML!"

For those of you out there who don't speak "Merde Minded Meph", allow me to translate.

OMG = "Oh My God".

COD = "Call Of Duty", the consistently regurgitated excuse for a "video game" and a general piece of wank which is, for some reason, the game of choice for the current craptastic generation of "hardcore gamers". Like almost all games released these days it's about war, which you know,
"is really different and stuff 'cos, like, other games are, like, gay and stuff, dude".

ADDITIONAL: The people who believe that this game is genuinely ground breaking, are actual idiots. I don't have a beef with violent video games or anything, hell, I really like some of them. But really? This? It's utterly terrible on all levels. I realise that it's a matter of opinion, but seriously.

Take your boob of a game game and piss the shit off.

FML = "Fuck My Life". Ah, yes. This is the modern aggravating and self absorbed insinuation that the person who uses this ignorant phrase just has the worst of luck. Ever.

This all sounds pretty complicated, Seph. What's your point?

Here's the punch line, readers.

Consider the point of view of a woman who's husband actually died in a REAL war, fighting for the freedom of people he's never even met and now never will, her life turned irreparably upside down. Life will never be the same for this poor woman, as she is what we refer to as a WIDOW.

She has suffered enough injustice and pain at this point, without trying to walk to the shop like a normal person, only to then over hear this phrase being used so flippantly, don't you think? I mean this is just one example, but come the crap on.

She doesn't want to open her newspaper to read a badly written, self important rant letter sent in by some ignorant shaft captain bitch who doesn't realise just how lucky she is to have someone to turn to in this unfair trial of life, moaning and comparing her temporary lack of attention with the tragedy of having the love of your life stolen from you before their time.

If I ever crossed paths with someone who claimed to be a "COD Widow" out loud, I'd have to freeze my own urine and stab them in the face with it, just so I could stab them and piss on them at once. In other words:

BOLLOCKS TO THAT, MATE.

Maybe, just maybe, in stead of using the internet to tell everyone about how you're a COD "Widow", or moaning about how your only allowed to go to ONE concert this week: Bieber or Kesha, and then going on to remind the rest of the world to "FYL" every time the second hand flies past the minute hand, you should be using it to learn about things such as basic first aid, how to speak other languages and how to repair things.

Wow, I can "learn" for "FUN"? Tell me MORE!

Turns out that THAT SHIT IS USEFUL.

I mean, wouldn't you appreciate the shit out of it if you were injured in another country and some random stranger ran over to help you out the best he could, even going as far as to use your language to make the whole experience easier on you in his home fucking country? You'd appreciate it a lot more than him filming it for YouTube and then tweeting to his friends about the dumb "foreigner" (We've been over this, you ARE one get used to it.) who just got "pwn3d", that's for sure.

You COD players get all riled up off your nerd-renaline, arguing online over who's the better player when you get beaten online? I'll tell you who is: THAT guy. He is the real hero my friends, and I mean it when I call you my friends because you're still reading this. Thank you.

The guy who has put his own life on hold and taken the time to educate himself on the facts of the world, just because. HE is the winner.

Want to know what else is great? YOU could be that guy. You can become a better person and learn about these things as well as much, much more using..... TA DA! You guessed it. The internet. It's like, totally RIGHT HERE, my man. Go ahead, touch it.

Ok, let's wrap this baby up so we can go play some Game Gear.

Maybe it's not all about how much your life is "sucking" at this moment in time. Maybe it's about doing what you can to help your fellow man, woman, animal or lady boy, depending on your current situation. Don't you think? Next time you get frustrated by something, don't rant to everyone who's following you online about this stuff. If it makes you feel better, then fine, but don't just cruise for sympathy. Go and calm down by reading some interesting facts online. It may just put your shit in perspective for you.

I'm not condemning social networking sites. I love them. Hell, they rock. Me and my totally still cool 20 - something buddies can use them to exchange stories of tragic pog matches and reminisce about bands like Blur and Silverchair. I'm not condemning social networking. I'm just saying that people are losing sight of why the internet was created in the first place. Exchanging ideas and information to help us grow as a civilisation.

And there's nothing less civilised than people actively ignoring all that others have worked their whole lives for on a daily basis, just because they're too busy being stressed out about how other people perceive them and their social image.